For what do I reach? you may ask. In Self-help 102 we recognize that what elicits a smile and an immediate lift of spirit are good indicators of fertile ground.

When you and this thing get together, there’s a quiet reverberation around the planet that makes your heart sing. That’s resonating at its finest.

Could be checking in with a favorite blog, just looking at a style of fiber art (if not make it yourself), a temperature and humidity range – you get the idea.

You may be better at recognizing these Joy Pullers at certain times more than others. We’ve all got ‘em, dozens and dozens of them, and they are there for a reason. They define who you are. They set you apart from the crowd.

They are also preferences that you may attempt to downplay or deny. Oops – another example of erroneous thinking. Who you are doesn’t just go away. It can be quite persistent in its nudges to get You back in the saddle.

That lift of spirit you experience when you allow yourself these simple pleasures – that’s You coming through, loud and clear. Leaving out these crucial pieces of the big picture is a major contributor to goal setting failure and fuels one or more myths of motivation, otherwise known as self-help sabotage.

“This is too hard. No matter what I try, nothing works. I’m just not smart enough. I’m not meant to be happy in this lifetime.” Horse hockey. That last goal you were going after, and the way in which you were going after it--did they line up with who you really are, or are they part of someone else’s ideas?

Once you get the hang of these things that resonate with you, or your Joy Pullers, they will help you learn to steer yourself clear of living a mistaken life, pursuing unintended things, hanging out with unsuitable people.

Here’s an example of a Joy Puller from my own life: basil.

Having grown up on the tundra in the Midwest, this and many other gastronomic pleasures were a big part of my cultural education when I lived in Italy for several years after graduating from college.

The aroma and the taste of this delectable herb knocked my socks off when it was first served to me on a plate with slices of fresh bufala mozzarella cheese and tomato, drizzled with olive oil harvested from the farm down the road.

Years later, back in the States, I cried real tears of joy being served a quite tolerable rendition of this insalada caprese in a back-woods restaurant in the Pacific Northwest. The chef’s kitchen stocked all the necessary ingredients and he generously agreed to my special request.

Granted, the quality of the ingredients left much to be desired compared to their Italian counterparts, but the memories triggered of that first encounter long ago were just as powerful as the initial experience.

What does swooning over a cooking herb have to do with self-help? At that point in time, I was about as far away as I could be from the life I wanted to be living, and that reconnection with who I really was through my sense of smell was a small but significant lifeline.

Even today, just a waft of the pungently sweet aroma from this plant’s leaves while standing in the produce section of my local market can send me into rapture.

And that’s the whole point. Each personal preference that I remember to include in my life, no matter how small or insignificant it may seem, a momentum begins to build from it.

The more I surround myself with my Joy Pullers, I am connecting with an energy that will provide all the personalized motivation I need, long after all the self-help books and tapes disintegrate in landfills far and wide. The more I spend time with those things that make my heart sing, the less I find time for the things that don’t. And so will you.

Comments

[Blissmonger]

Awesome, Chris! Thanks for sharing.

[Chris]

I can make the mountain ring
Here those birdies sing
Wind'll set the trees to dancing

We can sing the sun to shine
We can sing the sun to shine
Set your mind to glowing

So laugh away your troubles
And bring out the moonshine
Sitting in the trees
Sheltered from the cold of an evening breeze

You know where we all belong
So keep on dreaming
Get yourself strong
Keep on dreaming
Get yourself strong

You can change the world
Set your mind to it
Put your heart through it

Reach out to what you can climb
And keep on dreaming
Get yourself strong
Keep on dreaming
Get yourself strong

- Joe Mock (with my apologies for misquoting)

This is a Pied Pumkin song, and is a joy puller for me