blissmonger.com

every bad sale costs you five

My rule of thumb is this: every person you turn away because your product or service isn't right for them turns into three great customers down the road. Every bad sale costs you five.

--Seth Godin

ineluctably

Saw this word in a blog post: ineluctably. It's a mouthful. Not sure I'd ever use it in public based on how it feels on my tongue and how it sounds out loud. Not sure at all.

living on our own terms

I've bumped into this phrase, "living on their own terms", in a few disparate places during the past few days.

One was a television tribute to Farrah Fawcett, in which Barbara Walters admired her subject for living on her own terms. I don't remember that aspect of Farrah's life being as culturally transmitted as some others, and was pleased to be (re)introduced to it after her transition.

Another is the blog I bumped into today, whose owner is currently dedicated to the notion of people liberating themselves through living on their own terms.

I used to be a revolutionary kind of girl, wanting current structures to be disposed of so new ones could take their places.

I get now that that methodology doesn't work efficiently. Nothing needs to come tumbling down. That's just pushing-against and resistance operating at frequencies that I don't need to be around.

What makes sense to me now is allowing what doesn't work to discombobulate of its own accord, while I focus my attention on what I'd rather be being/doing/having. 

A reframe worth cultivating. One that doesn't promote dis-ease such as the likes that Farrah endured at the end of her life.

If this reframe were harnessed by a critical mass of people on the planet, entire new cultural shifts would spontaneously invent themselves in the energy released from paying attention to all the insignificant dramas that are perpetuated around the globe.

I can envision millions of people turning their heads away from their television sets and choose to invest their time in something else.

Can you?

~*~*~

COMMENT: (still not able to comment on my posts)

Randal, no, I was not dissing Farrah. I highly admire her ability to live her own life on her terms.

Someday science will focus on the underlying cause of cancer, heart attack, stress, etc. etc. rather than only a "cure" for them. Then we'll be getting somewhere.

new bliss bling

Before

After

New bliss bling at my etsy site. This set was a complete joy to usher into existence--but they all are. This one commemorated getting back in touch with some friends from another lifetime, and it was a lovely experience, full of great food, little ones, and appreciating what I've got in my life. Click on the link and take a look. Take some bling home with you.

signs, signs, everywhere a sign

Follow your gut.

That phrase used to bewilder me, since I had no clue what type of communication my gut was giving me.

Now that I've managed to rediscover how to tune in to that frequency, I do my best to honor the guidance it has in store. Even if that means stepping on someone else's toes, upsetting an apple cart, rocking the boat. I've sunk my own boat often enough by not listening to this guidance that it's too costly not to, in the end.

Maintaining boundaries, or not, with people teaches them, and you, how you want to be treated. Take a look at this area in your life and see the results all around you and erupting inside you if you don't feel so great.

Of course there's a way to let people know what you require, what you expect, what you prefer, and there's outright animosity and finger-pointing. I would highly recommend developing a sensitively delivered form of the former rather than the latter. Because if I'm coming from a place of feeling exploited, then I didn't do the due diligence of communicating what was on my mind in the first place. My bad.

This also enters the arena of bargaining with yourself about who you really are and what isn't acceptable in terms of behavior and esteem, or lack of it, from others. Hearing out loud coming from your own mouth what it is that you want is a powerful experience. And it gets easier with practice.

It's not about accusation. It's about clarification. And when you know on a cellular level something just isn't right, then it's time to say so, and go.

Before a decade goes by and your life isn't exactly what you thought it would be.

~*~*~

The comment function isn't working for me, so I'll include mine here:

Thanks, Linda!!

This awareness of mine has been a long time coming, Matt. Lots of opportunities to practice a different way to look at something. Lots of people conspiring to help me practice. And lots of decisions in baby step form to get to the critical mass that being "right" just isn't the nirvana it's cracked up to be.

Cuz it ain't.

funky buddha

Funky Buddha. Didn't make it there in my foray into the wilds of Chicago recently. So many places to check out. But I'll be back.

Just saw this go over the Twitter wire: "Don't waste your time believing you can't."

A few things out of whack with that statement. If you do waste your time believing that you can't do something, you probably aren't aware that that belief is unfounded.

If the concept of believing you can do something is so foreign to you that you haven't felt the slightest bit of relief that thought might offer you in a very long time, this advice is equally a waste of time.

Perhaps a better reframe might be, "You know that belief you keep thinking-- 'I can't' ?  It's possible that it's not true."

Living in doubt and fear leaves you open to only a certain bandwidth of sense. Someone in that place might be able to hear this more appropriately-stated-for-them message.

 

What goes with blissmongering? Why, a joy rebel, of course

Meandering around on Twitter today, I stumbled upon this awesome blog post from joy rebel:

An army for a joy rebellion that is!!!

I posted the following invitation on a dear online community that I am part of:

your mission, should you choose to accept it:
To become a bombastic warrior chick (or dude), a fierce member of the joy rebel army.

your training: hand to hand combat against that greatest of evils: self doubt
Expert use of rampant positivity, disciplined funkiness and deploying radical self acceptance against all odds. Your training will come at great sacrifice. Negativity dealers will confront you, energy vampires will attempt to kidnap you. You will become vigilant against their attempts to seduce you.

Your duties: To employ your own unique brand of joy. Wonderfully awful art, messy love, spontaneous dancing, cozy cuddling, quiet tears, angry letters, epic poems.

*warning* You may experience brain washing as your heart expands and floods the inner critic sentry that resides in your cranium. Side affects are: ridiculous grins, toe tapping in public, enchanted cursing, imperfect magic and a slight pink tinge to your aura.

So I stand before you, oh potential warrior. Do you choose to accept your mission??

And people did. This thing sort of grew and has some really fun energy behind it. Enough to the point where we plan having actual missions. Fun stuff like writing 'joy' on the sidewalk or giving yourself a warrior name or leaving a love note in a library book or...well, whatever we come up with.

So much fun, in fact, that I thought hey, I'll invite the switched on humans that I know in the blogging community too.

What I love about this is..well, if I can be honest. It's not another self help thing, another 'to do'. must clean house. must read book on self growth. must fix me. Don't get me wrong, I have had amazing and wonderful experiences because of what I've learned in several key self help or spiritual books. I'm not saying that growing and learning aren't important.

But if you want to know the truth, I think once you've read a few books, been to a few classes or workshops, you start to realize that the basic principles are the same. This is a good thing. It means that sound knowledge is still being passed down and shared. Whatever the newest self help book is on the market probably has the same basic ideas as 'power of positive thinking' from the 80's and 'think and grow rich' from the 30's (?).

Is anyone else tired of beating themselves over the head with criticism and fear and this list and that book and cleaning the house and saving the planet and getting a sale and getting published/discovered/written up/interviewed?

God I'm so sick of all of this. I'm tired of just trying so damn hard all the time and never taking time to appreciate and enjoy the life that I have now. The good now. The joy in me now.

The basics haven't changed.
listen to your heart
be kind (to yourself and others)
live in the moment
simplify
think positive
do good
breath
and my personal favorite: it's not enough to know these, it's time to live them.

So let's do that shall we??? Let's go have some fun.

I post weekly missions on the board. Of course anyone that wants to join the community is welcome to but I was also thinking I could just post them here as well (every monday).

Who's with me???"

~*~*~*~

I hope you don't mind the copy-and-paste, joy rebel, but I want to help spread the word about reclaiming your authentic self and remembering who you really are. Enough with the fix-it and must-do lists. We are here for joy.

I am so in.

ignominious declivity

"The ignominious declivity of the Internet will empower the entrenchment of our intestinal fortitude."

Um, sure, OK.

If you enjoyed that randomly generated phrase, you might have some fun over here: http://bit.ly/cTyJQ

graffiti with redeeming qualities

I walked around this part of the city, taking in the reclaimed aura of the buildings and the streets, mixing in with the people who live and work there now: babies in strollers, babushkas inspecting their neighborhoods, and every age and status in between, and the undeniable presence of those who first lived here a century and a half ago. They watch us, wondering what we'll do with our choices, our time, our talents, our dreams.

out with the old, in with the new

So this inner grappling I've been doing with my expression of late seems to be producing an interesting result: I'm thinking about coming up with a new vocabulary, a new language for articulating what's in my head. So I'm going to experiment with communication in new ways for the next few weeks and see what happens.

that still small voice is your sanity talkin'

I discovered yet another layer to the adage that that still small voice inside your head, it's your sanity talkin'. Many times over the last five or six days I've hit the sides of this pinball game called life that I'm in and sacheted off the bumpers, glad for the warning that the thoughts I was thinking were about to send me down to that end-of-the-game hole at the bottom if I wasn't going to pay attention. And frantically flayling with the flipper mechanisms at that point is just a waste of time. Much better to catch it in the early stages when the lights and buzzers are participating in your favor.

 

Me, taken with the help of the reflective sides of The Bean in Millennium Park in downtown Chi-town.

Cutie patootie on her way to get soaked at the spitting wall. Photos of that event later. Time to nap and recuperate from the drive.

fabulousness

So much fabulousness is going on in my life right now.

I would be typing for days to get it all documented, so I've been resisting that lock on my time rather than just living it all, moment to moment.

For now I will say that I am in Chicago for the Abe seminar tomorrow. Driving in rush hour traffic is never much fun--'nuff said,' nuff focus on something I can't do anything about and is over already. While I'm waiting for my friend's flight to land and to take the shuttle and check in, the nice young man behind the desk at the Crown Plaza was kind enough to log me in to the wifi system. The employees here are awesome--they answer all questions from everyone with grace and with a smile. You don't see that every day, now do you?

In a few days I will be time warping when I meet up with some people I haven't seen for 25 years. Quite extraordinary, really. I can't imagine how it happened that I am at the point in my life where I can do that kind of math. The next 48 hours will be a whirlwind infusion of jazzedness, humor, eye and ear candy, fabulous food, and great company. In anticipation, I'm remembering all the times in my life when I've been so excited about what was about to transpire that I couldn't stand it.

Now I'm savoring the vibe and extracting all the goodness I can out of the time leading up to the events. I remember Tiger Woods saying something about learning how to reign in the highs of his wins and the lows of his losses, working toward a more balanced overall approach to his game and his life. I find great value in that advice. Fewer sugar highs and fewer plummets in the depths make for a happier psyche and a healthier body.

In a few weeks when I'm back home, appreciating the rural setting of where I live and remembering this excellent adventure, then I can suck the marrow out of the bones if it all.

lush yumminess

This is the result of a design commission from a new friend who gave me this to work with: "I got this hot pink sweater from my mom, and since then have gotten a few other articles of clothing the same color, with nothing to wear with it. Maybe throw in some orange, too."

 

there comes a time

For a long time we lean against the trees in the circle and they hold us up. But there comes a time when we realize that we must become the tree in the circle, able to hold the leaning of others.

--Sue Monk Kidd

to find the balance

"It's not that I felt we should go backward in history to a bygone time and live out the old matriarchal consciousness as it was then. The ancient Goddess cultures were probably not utopia, but still they appear to have been remarkably egalitarian and nonviolent. The feminine was honored, sexuality was sacred, and the cultures apparently supported no split between nature and spirit.

"The images of Goddess reflect this consciousness. They reveal to us what we've excised form our lives today. I didn't want to toss aside the evolutionary progress we'd achieved or the masculine symbols of God. Rather, I wanted to wed them with the lost feminine dimensions, whose origins and promise lay unclaimed by antiquity.

"Reclaiming the ancient feminine consciousness as a model of what's possible, integrating it into the world as it is now evolving, and balancing it with masculine symbol, image, and power together allow us to go forward and create an utterly new consciousness, one large enough and strong enough to carry us into the future."

--Sue Monk Kidd, The Dance of the Dissident Daughter

Amen to that. The planet needs both--masculine direction and feminine energy--to find the balance it needs to thrive, as do the cultures that it supports. Enough empty claims of one-best-way, one-size-fits-all. That simply doesn't exist: for religion, education, relationships, well-being, raising children or cooking a meal. 

to wither from inattention

Culture would love to keep us embroiled in gender wars rather than embrace what is true--that we are all diminished by what our culture tells us about nearly everything and that we all know on some level are lies. I choose to refocus my energy on the truths and allow the lies to wither from inattention, rather than all the potential life force that has been marginalized for millenia.

Enough.

--Blissmonger

they were made male and female

Somewhere along the course of a woman's life, usually when she has lived just long enough to see through some of the cherished notions of femininity that culture holds out to her, when she finally lets herself feel the limits and injustices of the female life and admits how her own faith tradition has contributed to that, when she at last stumbles in the dark hole made by the absence of a Divine Feminine presence, then the extraordinary thing I've been telling you about will happen. This woman will become pregnant with herself, with the symbolic female-child who, will, if given the chance, grow up to reinvent life.

--Sue Monk Kidd

I'm a woman who grew up in this culture, so I know that what she is saying is true. But this applies to everyone in the culture who is damaged through marginalization, through becoming trivial to greater powers, through being ignored, through enduring the organized school system, through enduring the organized religious system, through enduring the corporate culture. We are all lessened by control over who we become, no matter the source or the gender we may inhabit. If it is from Divine Feminine that recognizing this to be so helps us wake up, so be it.

There's room for everyone at the table.

Super Size Me

I decided to watch the documentary Super Size Me again, and include my son in this second viewing.

We have discussions about what's really in the food we eat, and what numbers on the nutrition label are relevant, and why juice or lemonade isn't that great an alternative to pop because of the sugar content, so I thought this movie would be great grist for the better choices mill.

Besides the horror that was Spurloch's liver as he traversed this fast food diet journey, what sticks in my mind is the unmoving condition of the French fries in the jar experiment, a visual validation of how differently genetically modified food exists in the world, and in our bodies. The sheer number of people who regularly ingest that stuff boggles the mind.

And it made me think of Resistance Toys in a new light. Fake food and fake life have a lot in common. Emotional and physical health impairment, quality of life issues, a narrowing of experience. Eating predominantly healthy food and living from the place of who you really are changes everything.

As a citizen of the number one fattest city in America (unless some other locale has claimed that honor since 2005), I embrace my wacko perceptions even more after revisiting the concepts in this film.

Today will include more fresh produce and more humor.

How about you?

little man

Our family says good-bye to elementary school this week and ushers in the middle school years. I used to teach in a middle school, so I'm not exactly excited about what happens to bodies that hang out in those kinds of places, both young adult and adult. But it is what it is, and all of my fervent advocating against the process won't change it. I can effectively mitigate against the effects with my own day-to-day ministerings and maintaining of perspective outside the four walls of a school building, and that is enough.

So here we go. We're watching Super Size Me for good measure.

how religion poisons everything

"Nothing optional--from homosexuality to adultery --is ever made punishable unless those who do the prohibiting (and exact the fierce punishments) have a repressed desire to participate."

Chistopher Hitchens--God is Not Great: How Religion Poisons Everything

Religions in and of themselves are not poisonous. It's the human twisting and transmorgraphying that goes on after a spiritual practice has been encountered that poisons the original thought. But this is going to be a fun read anyway. I found it in the Recommended and In Demand section of my local library. They never cease to amaze....

managing human resources

More from The Cluetrain Manifesto by Rick Levine, Christopher Locke, Doc Searls and David Weinberger. They write about what the Web has done to terminate business as usual. I would further assert that their thesis stands when substituting "education", "health care", or "spirituality" for the word "business". The Web, or the web, as I think it prefers to be called now, has provided the space for our voices to speak true and strong as we wake up from our culturally-induced sleep.

   

~*~*~

The idea that we can manage our world is uniquely twentieth-century and chiefly American...It wasn't always thus. For millennia, we assumed that being in control was the exception and living in a wildly risk-filled world was the norm:

    As flies to wanton boys, are we to the gods.
They kill us for their sport.

King Lear

Today these awful words sound like one of those quaint, primitive ideas we've outgrown.

The belief in the managed environment is a denial of the brute "facticity" of our lives. The truth is that businesses cannot be managed. They can be run, but they exist in a world that is so far beyond the control of the executives and the shareholders that "managing" a business is a form of magical belief that gets punctured the first time a competitor drastically lowers prices, a large trading partner's economy falters, a key supplier's factory burns down, your lead developer gets a better offer, your CEO becomes felonious, or an angry consumer wins an unfair lawsuit.

As flies to wanton boys are companies to their markets. They pull off a company's wings for sport.

~*~*~

A business has a voice. You can usually hear it--authentic or unauthentic--most obviously and transparently, on its Web site. Even before the last graphic finishes downloading, you can usually tell if the company speaks with passion, if it's lost or uninterested, or if it's online just because a consultant said it has to be. You can tell if the business has some perspective on itself or whether it's all wrapped up in being the Number One Provider of Something, Anything, Please! You can tell if it wants to talk with you or just to pick your pocket. You can tell if the people who work there really care or carry their resume with them, just in case. You can tell if the company is basically lying or basically telling the truth.

Ah, but can you really tell? All the customer has to go by are bits on a screen. Couldn't a clever marketing person pony up a page that looks hip and happy, successfully masking the cries of anguish coming from the corporate cube farm?

Yes, for awhile. Marketing has been training its practitioners for decades in the art of impersonating sincerity and warmth. But marketing can no longer keep up appearances. People talk. They get on the Web and they let the world know that the happy site with the smiling puppy masks a company with coins where its heart is supposed to be. They tell the world that the company that promises to make you feel like royalty doesn't reply to email messages and makes you pay the shipping charges when you return their crappy merchandise. The market will find out who and what you are. Count on it.

That's why you poison your own well when you lie. You break trust with your own people as well as your customers. You may be able to win back the trust you've blown, but only by speaking in a real voice, and by engaging people rather than delivering messages to them.

~*~*~

People on the planet crave authenticity, whether it be on the part of government, at the corner store, in their child's third-grade classroom or from the pulpit on Sunday. The walls we've built through unspoken cultural agreement about what we believe is acceptable have holes and cracks and the light shines through at the most inopportune places.

That's where the craving is at its most intense--where the pretense shows the most. The fear that keeps those holes getting replastered and refilled won't be able to keep up with the ruse. It's been exposed and seen by too many, and the reasons to maintain the facade just aren't holding water any longer.

We've woken up.

Of course, not all of us have. But it doesn't take 100 per cent participation to initiate momentum toward something new. There is a critical mass, a tipping point phenomenon, around 11 per cent if I remember Malcolm's words correctly--and please correct me if I'm wrong--that begins the wild ride.

"Wild" in some people's definitions, in comparison to where they've been spending their awareness most often. If authenticity is already a part of your psyche, then it doesn't feel so wild to live it. The wild part is getting over the fear that the other shoe is going to drop, that there is some calamity about to ensue since some procedure isn't being followed, that independent thinking might start a revolution.

Well, it does. But revolutions don't have to bloody. They don't have to marginalize anyone. They don't even have to be all that painful, change-wise. That's pretty much up to the folks who push against what's coming with we can't do that, we've always done it this way, there is no precedent, we can't envision it.

That's OK. Because there are plenty who can envision it. They already are. They see in their minds' eyes how it could be. They see the possibilities. They see how things can work just fine.

All we have to do is get over the fear that we've been taught so well, and we can join them, these blissmongers--people who understand that the power of climbing the emotional scale can and does indeed change their worlds, one erroneous belief at a time.

And in turn, changes ours.

been there, done that

"The condition of man is already close to satiety and arrogance, and there is danger of destruction of everything in existence."

- a Brahmin to Onesicritus, 327 BC, reported in Strabo's Geography

three years, lost

"Americans spend an average of four hours a day watching TV, an hour of that enduring ads. That adds up to an astounding 10% of total leisure time; at current rates, a typical viewer fritters away three years of his life getting bombarded with commercials."

- Scott Woolley, Forbes

~*~*~

This is your brain. This is your brain on television. Any questions?

the clearing

So I finished another round of the master cleanse this week, my previous stint having been a few years ago. The first time around I had an incredible surge of energy and enthusiasm and stunning breakthroughs on issues. This time around I didn't sleep well and have been in sort of a resistant but very mild funk, until just a little while ago. I have no idea why either trend happened, but it's always interesting to observe whatever shows up, and then goes away.

It's an amazing thing, to be alive. To interact with others. To connect on levels we aren't even capable of interpreting with our senses. To change and grow and expand and react and integrate and laugh. And it's all good.

It feels like someone left the gate open. I can't wait to see what happens next.

roller coaster

It's taken me quite a few decades to find myself in a situation where I felt like riding a roller coaster (the amusement park variety, not the life's ups and downs variety--that's a given :-). Yesterday I sat in the pod of the car, clicked the body harness into place, and closed my eyes; that's the only way my vestibular system would tolerate this experience. Breathing was important, too--focusing on the moment and breathing deeply through each twist and turn proved pivotal to my maintaining my sanity. I kept telling myself that it would be over soon, and it was.

My legs were a tad wobbly while walking away from the ride, but I was proud of myself for going through with it. I don't think I'll need to ever do it again, but it was fun in a crazy sort of way, and I'm glad I did it. Somehow I managed to set my resistance to the idea aside, and just went with it. Maybe having interacted with the group of folks who are playing with my Resistance Toy material gave me the boost out of nowhere--it truly isn't something I ever thought I would do.

But then, life is full of surprises and shifts that we never thought would be possible.

Until they are.

The learning curve ll

Blame. Blame. Blame. Blame. Blame. Blame. Blame. Blame. Blame. Blame. Blame. Blame. Blame. Blame. Blame. Awareness. Blame. Blame. Blame. Blame. Blame. Blame. Blame. Blame. Blame. Blame. Blame. Blame.  Awareness. Blame. Blame. Blame. Blame. Blame. Blame. Blame. Blame. Blame. Awareness. Blame. Blame. Blame. Blame. Awareness. Blame. Blame. Blame. Shift.

The Shack attack

Several friends of mine recommended reading The Shack recently. I got a hold of a copy and have been enjoying the craft of a well-told story. When I read something that is based on or steeped in a particular spiritual belief, I take what makes sense to me and leave the rest. My Resistance Wrangler ears perked up around a few of the passages that I think are pertinent to the whole Resistance Toy idea:

~*~*~

"Tell me what you are afraid of, Mack."

"Well, let me see. What am I afraid of?" began Mack. "Well, I am afraid of looking like an idiot. I am afraid that you are making fun of me and that I will sink like a rock. I imagine that--"

"Exactly," Jesus interrupted. "You imagine. Such a powerful ability, the imagination! That power alone makes you so like us. But without wisdom, imagination is a cruel task-master. If I may prove my case, do you think humans are designed to live in the present or the past or the future?"

"Well," said Mack, hesitating, "I think the most obvious answer is that we were designed to live in the present. Is that wrong?"

Jesus chuckled. "Relax, Mack. This is not a test, it's a conversation. You are exactly correct, by the way. But now tell me, where do you spend most of your time in your mind, in your imagination: in the present, in the past, or in the future?"

Mack thought for a moment before answering. "I suppose I would have to say that I spend very little time in the present. I spend a big piece in the past, but most of the rest of the time I am trying to figure out the future."

"Not unlike most people. When I dwell with you, I do so in the present--I live in the present. Not the past, although much can be remembered and learned by looking back, but only for a visit, not an extended stay. And for sure, I do not dwell in the future you visualize or imagine...

"It is your desperate attempt to get some control over something you can't. It is impossible for you to take power over the future because it isn't even real, nor will it ever be real. You try to play God, imagining the evil that you fear becoming reality, and then you try to make plans and contingencies to avoid what you fear..."

~*~*~

This pretty much sums up the intention and the efficacy of a Resistance Toy--helping you to refocus your attention on the here and now, which is where all your power is, as opposed to revisiting the past and trying to populate the future from the lower registers of the emotional scale.

Humor and love--all great religions started here, and all great Resistance Toys are made from this place.

How's it going with yours? 

life run wild

Inside, outside, there's a conversation going on today that wasn't happening at all five years ago and hasn't been very much in evidence sine the Industrial Rveolution began. Now, spanning the planet via Internet and World Wide Web, this conversation is so vast, so multifaceted, that trying to figure out what it's about is futile. It's bout a billion years of pent-up hopes and fears and dreams coded in serpentine double helixes, the collective flashback deja vu of our strange perplexing species. Something ancient, elemental, scared, something very very funny that's broken loose in the pipes and wires of the twenty-first century.

There are millions of threads in this conversation, but at the beginning and end of each one is a human being. That this world is digital or electronic is not the point. What matters is that it exists in narrative space. The story has come unbound. The world of commerce became precipitously permeable while it wasn't looking and sprang a leak from a quarter least expected. The dangers of democracy pale before the danger of uncontained life. Life with the wraps off. Life run wild...

While this may sound spooky and mystical and terribly uncorporate, it isn't meant to put you Fortune 500 types off. When you get right down to it, human begins are spooky and mystical and terribly uncoroporate, and corporations--if you'd only let yourselves admit it--consist entirely of human beings. Sort of neat how that works out. So the bottom line is: you can play in the Internet headspace as well as anyone.

There are just three conditions: 1) you have to let your people play for you, since there's really nobody else at home; 2) you have to play, not something more serious and goal-oriented; and 3) related to the previous, you have to have at least some tenuous notion of what "headspace" might mean. It's not in the dictionary. But you can ask around. Get the general hang of the thing. If you figure it out, we'll think you're cool and consume mass quantities of all your wonderful products.

See how easy life can be when you loosen up a little?

You laugh, we laugh with you.

Either way, we live.

~~~~~~~~

~Internet Apocalypso, Christopher Locke

the learning curve

Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Awareness. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Awareness. Judge. Judge. Judge. Awareness. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Judge. Stop.

we're finding our internal biodiversity

Please welcome http://joyicity.blogspot.com/ to the cyberverse. Some of her more pithy lines: "We're finding our internal biodiversity." Good stuff here.

calling all Resistance Toy lovers

Dear Partner in Crime,

You are receiving this email because in the past you expressed interest in being notified of new developments at my website Reach.Dabble.Shine, my blog 28 Years Later, or more recently, blissmonger.com, the funky brainchildren of Deb Schanilec (that’s me, aka Blissmonger :-) ).

Some of you may remember taking part in a focus group for my weight-loss material a few years ago through Artella and received my Tenacious Tidbits.

Well, I’ve written a new e-course, and I’m looking for folks who are interested in providing feedback while having fun interacting with this new material.

*Have you ever declared in your mind that, starting tomorrow, you were going to be doing something differently, something that would be of great benefit but just hadn’t found its place on your “Accomplished” list yet?

*As you approached assimilating this new thing into your day-to-day life, did it happen easily and quickly?

*Or perhaps did you encounter a bit of discussion with yourself in your head about how difficult it was, how bad you were at sticking to the plan, and that it wasn’t ever going to happen the way you wanted it to happen?

That, my friends, is called Resistance. We’ve all experienced it, and we all know how crazy-making it can be when it shows up.

My new e-course is called Resistance Toys: Clever Distractions Designed to Change Your Mind One Neuropathway at a Time. In it I demonstrate how humor and creativity have helped me to dissolve the choke-hold Resistance often exerts, and how to use that power to succeed in whatever change you may be thinking about initiating into your life:

A) Eating habits
B) Exercising regularly
C) Finding a different/more suitable/better paying job
D) Making time for myself
E) Cut down or stop smoking
F) Getting more sleep
G) Feel better about myself
H) Improve a relationship(s)
I) Other_______________________________________

If you have some time to play during the next few weeks and you’d like to experiment stress-free with some arena of change in your life, you are invited to join this focus group experience!

The first installment of material is waiting for you at http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Resistancetoysfocusgroup the Yahoo group. Click on the blue “Join This Group” button on the right-hand side to get started.

Should you have any problems with signing up, please let me know at resistance.toys at gmail.com, and we’ll figure it out.

After working on this project for quite some time, I am excited to send this material out into the world and watch what happens. Your participation would mean so much, and if you do decide to join, I appreciate the time you are taking out of your busy schedule to do so.

If it just isn’t for you right now however I understand. Pass it on to a friend who might enjoy it.

Either way, have fun, and may the bliss be with you~

Deb Schanilec
http://blissmonger.com/

carpolites

Who knew--my Mother's Day ceramic tabletop fountain came complete with not just rocks, but carpolites. I must say that the translation job on the instructions was nearly flawless til I came across this term. I even had to look it up, and the word processing dictionary I'm using right now doesn't recognize it, either. According to the mini article on Wikipedia on the subject of its synonym "road metal", the term is commonly used these days in New Zealand but nowhere else. I love these universes of knowledge that open up in all their glory where there was ignorance before. Thank you, The Joy of Gardening, for making this all possible.

74 years, 1 month, 14 days

Cruising through a graveyard isn't something I do every day, but there are usually feasts of contrast and texture to be found, like this one. It's interesting that people's lives used to be tallied to the day for their headstones. I wonder when that custom changed.

peaceful warrior

 

"A warrior is not about perfection or victory or invulnerability. He's about absolute vulnerability."

Finally saw Peaceful Warrior with Nick Nolte last night on dvd. I liken the experience to when I finally read Eat, Pray, Love. I think something about waiting to savor these two gems is what packed the punch both of them had. And perhaps there was some sort of energetic thing going on with waiting. Doesn't really matter, but I'm going to see if I can remember this and look for a trend.

The friend I watched the film with was busy writing down lines that resonated with him, which was most of the time, there were so many. But just now when I looked up quotes from the movie on google, nothing really resonates as much as it did last night. And that's fine. The resonating did its thing and I woke up in another frame of mind this morning.

While I was out on my 4.5 mile walk, I was thinking about some of the scenes, and at a certain point I thought I saw myself emerge from a ripple in the field, so to speak. Hard to explain, like so much of Dan's character's experience, and not transmuted easily to someone else. But that's part of the deal--focus and a disciplined mind that's thrown out as much of its garbage as possible is what it takes.

Blissmongering is my name for it.

form and shape your substance

Someone recommended the book Spiritual Economics by Eric Butterworth to me the other day, and I picked it up in a store whose owner stashes his own, dog-earred copy under the counter. He asked me what a blissmonger was. I said, "Blissmongers are folks who understand how positive thinking pays off in enhanced physical and emotional well-being, and they find a way to do it more often than not." He seemed taken aback a bit, and stumbled on articulating how difficult it is to maintain a positive outlook. This surprised me even more when I got to the following passage of this book:

"When you are in charge of your mind, in the consciousness of oneness with the creative flow, when you are working with life itself instead of against it, when you are positive and loving and secure in the conviction of Truth, then you are under the “white cloud” (Psalm 91 calls it “the shadow of the Almighty”). In this consciousness, syntropy does its work: parking spaces open up for you; stocks go up as you buy; dishonest people are fair in their dealings with you; jobs appear; promotions come. It would appear that you are living a “charmed life.” Actually, it is nothing more or less than consciousness out-forming itself.

And when you maintain an optimistic view toward conditions in the world and are incurably “bullish” toward the economy in general, regardless of what the economic “gloom casters” may be saying, then you carry your while cloud of syntropy out into the world. You become a positive and highly contagious influence for a condition of general prosperity. In a very real sense, you make a difference!

Remember, your fortune, your personal success, and your prosperity are not in the hands of some “fickle finger of fate”—nor are they determined by sudden changes in the economy. The answer is in your conditioned ability to form and shape the ever-present substance of the Universe. You can change your luck.

Resolve that you will chase off the black cloud of entropy. Paul gives the key (Phillips translation): “Don’t let the world around you force you into its mold, but let God remold your mind from within.” Establish yourself under the white cloud of entropy. You will walk and work in  a consciousness in which all things will really work for good. Even a job dismissal will turn out to be the best thing that has eve happened to you, as you are serendipitously directed into a new career. Some will call it luck. Just be sure you call it consciousness. Your fortune begins with you!

Henry Thoreau seems to sum it up for us in this quotation from his classic work Walden with gender references changed by me because I can and because it makes sense to:

"If one advances confidently in the direction of her dreams, and endeavors to live the life which she has imagined, she will meet with a success unexpected in common hours. She will put some things behind, will pass an invisible boundary: new, universal, and more liberal laws will begin to establish themselves around and within her; or old laws will be expanded and interpreted in her favor in a more liberal sense, and she will live with license of a higher order of begins."

******

I am currently working on some material for an e-course about strategies that will help maintain that positive outlook, and with the topic coloring my version of reality, it surprises me when people who claim to get this stuff, don't really. It makes me wonder what part of the book this person really resonates with. I guess I'll find out.

a thunderstorm and a tornado

Two fabulous things happened today. OK, more than that did--many, many fabulous things happened today, but there are a couple that make me want to write about them. Which is what I do here.

The first was, the power came back on after approximately 24 hours without it. Huge banks of thunderstorms moved through where I call home most of the afternoon and one in particular made its presence known unequivocally. I was inside a thrift store establishment with a movable wall that was partially open, and a door on the other end of the building that was also open. All of a sudden the rain started descending in torrents, and the wind picked up and sucked air through so fast, dishes were crashing and people were screaming. I ducked into a dressing room for a moment and did some deep breathing to center some energy and help move that sucker out of the area. No one was hurt there, but when I got home, no power.

The second amazing thing that happened today was listening to the latest Abraham cd from the monthly subscription. Much of most cds and  intros are very apropos to little old me, so much so that I demonstrate to myself the law off attraction every time I open the envelope and pop in the cd. This one, however, arrived with some extra special LOA juice just for me--someone was asking about expansion that didn't have to include going back to work full time in order to manifest that expansion.

I smiled during the entire track. It was the first one with a guest's question on the cd. Made my day and I'm going to put that sucker in as many paces and on as many different media as I possibly can so it's engraved in my psyche.

Casting director, your skills at this coordinating thing are constantly raising the bar on themselves, and I can't wait to see what happens next.

optimistic conspectus

A place where people go to be optimistic. What a great idea. My posting appears in the "Women" and "The Americas" column. Pass it on!!

another place i'd love to work

A job description for a web/graphic designer from Realtree in Columbus GA:

OK, you can design the hell out of it. But can you concept it, lay it out, and mock it up? Can you code it? Can you make it wiggle? Can you shoot it? Can you direct it? Can you manage it? Now, can you do all of that for a camouflage company?

Realtree is a leader in the outdoor industry, and we're looking for freak of nature. Part graphic designer. Part web-head. Part pop-cultural demigod. Our in-house creative team handles all of our brand identity, print, collateral, television, and web work. We love paper and ink, but we do realize 1's and 0's are taking over. Which is why we're looking for a hybrid to join our team.

Nice But Not Must-Haves

• Experience
• After Effects
• Photography
• Video Editing
• Hunting Trophies

How fun would that be?!

new bliss bling

New bliss bling available. Let the spiral energy vortex be with you :-)

#oh4six

Lots of talk these days about social media--which to use to get the most customers. How about we bring the conversation back around to serving the perfect customers for you, and serving quality products and/or services they want?

I saw this sign at the condiments counter after purchasing a very nicely executed latte at a local Biggby's. Great sentiment here, but what about people calling to tell you how great they think your products are, or the people who work in your stores? Or suggestions on how to make things better, new products to try, etc.

And if people do call, what are they going to encounter? A template survey recording? Or a real person who will interact with them? Will you collect their email address to send them a thank-you for their interest, and here's a discount coupon on their next visit? Or will you spam them with endless enticements to buy your stuff because you think they should?

Authentic, transparent, two-way communication between businesses (and I'm not singling Biggby's out, they just happened to be where my camera was today) and their customers is what is going to bring your economy around. Ultimately, it doesn't matter which platform you use to do that: direct mail, Yellowpages, blog, website, Facebook, YouTube, Twitter, or whatever vehicle gets dreamed up next week. It matters how you go about using them to build a community of fans rather than selling to us.

If you are wise enough to get that community-building is crucial, how would you answer these mighty fine questions--are you #oh4six?

 1. Do you think monetization first?

 2. Can you articulate what value your community provides for your fans?

 3. Will you build it and then decide how the movement progresses?

 4. Will you allow community members to interact with each other via a platform you provide?

 5. Will you encourage those natural leaders who rise to the top of your community to blaze trails in ways you probably wouldn't have thought of on your own?

 6. Do you care about these fans of yours as people?

Answering these questions about you is no mystery for your customers. Will their answers all be in the negatory? That's zero for six--#oh4six. Word-of-mouth marketing embraces these tenets of building community and relationships with that track record. Let us tell our stories about our experiences with your company and spread the word about how cool your product and/or service is. Listen to what's being said, and get out of the way of how it grows.

I learned everything I know about word-of-mouth from Brains on Fire. But they are oh so far away and not able to meet at a #tweetup. Through the beauty of Twitter I've had the great fortune to meet some local folks who have this paradigm running in their veins as well, like Curve and Module. They're batting #oh4six and can help you do it, too.

Community builds around your business regardless of your being aware of it or not. Put some energy toward which way that community leans for you. Be #oh4six and proud.

Susan Boyle

I started watching the Susan Boyle videos on Monday, and have been as captivated as everyone else on the planet with her talent, her story, how she transformed cynicism to genuine admiration on the part of jaded judges, if not disaffected audience members.

The part that appeals to me the most is knowing that there is something like her Britain's Got Talent experience in all of us--an unexpected explosion of authenticity and enthusiasm just waiting to find the appropriate opening. Especially because it probably won't be on the same scale as Susan's notoriety.

Her gift is world-class, globally appreciated. Does your mind go down the road of "I'll never do something like that"? Don't let it. The only difference between Susan's story and yours is that she didn't give up on her dream.

There is something inside every one of us that the world needs to hear, see or understand, and the people who are waiting for that thing to appear. They may not know that they are waiting for it to appear, but they are, and when they do encounter it, their lives are changed forever.

Your contribution to humanity may be as seemingly insignificant as buying that pair of cowgirl boots that you've always wanted to wear because deep down you are that cowgirl. Taking that baby-step toward what you've convinced yourself is silly, crazy, insane, petty or ridiculous will soon reveal itself as the catalyst for all manner of chain reaction that lights up your life with satisfaction and contentment. Because you allowed yourself to be who you really are, despite all your efforts to the contrary.

What smallest action that you can imagine would take you from numbed-out-from to re-engaged-with-life? The thing that you think people will judge you for, that will prompt derision and ridicule, but will transform you in ways that you can vaguely sense as mildly dangerous? Buy that book, call that person, investigate that degree program, put that canvas on the easel, open that draft of a novel, google that travel destination?

Baby-steps, we're talkin'. No full-blown, overwhelming manifestation, just a baby-step toward one.

Let that nag at you a little more insistently today while you consider actually doing it.

And go watch Susan.

it's who you know, how you look at it, and what you do

The Glass is Half FULL

View more presentations from Marta Kagan.

sweet magnolia

Spring break. Good times. Left five inches of snow behind and found magnolia blossoms swelling from the branches. There's something about those petals that makes me want to eat them like tempura. Still groovin' on a friend's new place and feel the awesome energy that will surely conspire to inspire her to new heights--truly gorgeous surroundings. Picked up a copy of Attracting Perfect Customers and started weaving the connections from previous work with what they consolidate in one place. Sorry marathons with Little Man and grandparents. Excellent finds at Goodwill in NE Portland.

Now to unpack and reconfigure for the perfect situation that is on its way with perfect timing and amazing fit. Bring it.

shiney and new

Met up with a friend who is starting a brand new chapter in her life in the most beautiful space, surrounding herself with what she wants in it. This has been a long time coming, and it's all manifesting so beautifully. Quite a sight to behold. Great inspiration here, on many levels.

a little bit of this and a little bit of that

I'll be off having a little bit of this and a little bit of that aforementioned above stuff this week so postings will be minimal during break time. Enjoy!

not get sent to prison for complaining

"I'm going to use some of my time to change my habits. When someone cuts me off in traffic, instead of name-calling, I'm going to think of someone who did a tiny act of kindness in recent memory. Maybe it's the person who let me onto a jammed expressway, or the person who helped a senior pick up the cane he had dropped.

Next time I have to call tech support and push 1,2,3, etc., I'm going to remember that I live in a country where there is electricity and things available for reasonable prices that need tech support, and remember that, eventually, I will get help on my issue and not get sent to prison for complaining."

Linda Robinson
Guest Column The South Lyon Herald | April 2, 2009 | www.58moon.com

confident abandonment

Four Steps to Spiritual Freedom by Thomas Ryan

"Somewhere I had read: fear is essentially un-Christian. I had not really understood, but this provocative phrase had struck and, in an unplanned moment of lucidity, it shook me to the core. It did not happen suddenly. Nothing snapped. Rather unexpectedly yet slowly: like a lake freezing in a snow-flurried December, or like an obscure shoreline dawning on the unhurried horizon, the panic, the nausea, the desperation sublimated into a reawakened trust, a more humble yet more passionate readiness to listen to what witness God wished me to offer here and now in each breath, in each gesture and with each word from my lips. I rediscovered the peaceful excitement of confident abandonment."

While the religious language of this passage doesn't resonate with me, the spiritual vibe does. I love that term confident abandonment with regards to surrender and letting go of what you cannot control anyway. And what makes more sense to me to listen for is that still small voice within that never leaves, never takes a misstep, is never wrong.

Confident abandonment. Give it a try.

fewer and fewer rattles

From the Mixed-up Files of Mrs. Basil E. Frankweiler popped into my head awhile ago. 

I still remember the experience of reading that book when I was near the age of the protagonist, Claudia--twelve or so. I loved the spunk and the adventure and the whole idea of running away and living in the Met in Manhattan. How cool would that be?

Ever on the lookout for something to divert Little Man's attention from action figure world, I checked out the book at the library this weekend and started reading it aloud. At first he wasn't all that interested, but I persevered and got him hooked enough that he didn't notice when I passed the first page mark where I said he could decide whether we would continue or not. Now he wants to start over and read it again.

One of my favorite parts:

Claudia said, "But Mrs. Frankweiler, you should want to learn one new thing every day. We did even at the museum."

"No," I answered, "I don't agree with that. I think you should learn, of course, and some days you must learn a great deal. But you should also have days when you allow what is already in you to swell up inside of you until it touches everything. And you can feel it inside you.

"If you never take time out to let that happen, then you just accumulate facts, and they begin to rattle around inside of you. You can make noise with them, but never really feel anything with them. It's hollow."

Here's to feeling full, all you peeps who are figuring out how to get by one day at a time like the rest of us. Connect with someone today, and see how it fills both of you up, especially for them when they needed it most and couldn't say it out loud.

And here's to fewer and fewer rattles. Noise pollution on the soul level. Distracting at best, disempowering at worst.

Think I'll go make a resistance toy rattle.....

bucky fuller

It is very logical that man should fight to the death when he thinks there's not enough to go around.

In a fire, he loses all reason, goes mad, and tramples his fellow men to death as he competes for air.

It is also logical that man won't fight when he knows there's enough to go around.

It is logical. It is logical. It is logical.

good to know it's going to melt tomorrow

Swirling, blowing, sticking snow. So bizarre. Like, are you freakin' kidding me?