Tuesday, July 27, 2010

like that

Pushing against 

http://ow.ly/2hvkP

I look around and take stock of where I'm not.

Hello. When I do that, I miss the opportunity to enjoy what's going on in front of me.

Like the kid who was amazed I knew his name and wasn't too thrilled about it. A few days later, he came back into my classroom to just stand around and hang during passing time until the bell rang.

Like the meltdown I talked my son through stepping away from the edge of ever so deftly.

Like the enraptured joy on the face of a one-year-old's savoring of pretty shiny things on another woman's fingers.

Like the shift in my solar plexus I can feel when I manage a baby step in the direction I want to go from frustration to mere pessimism, causing my casting director to shift everything that's waiting in the wings offstage for me in that direction too.

Like putting together some lime green and fuchsia bracelets that make my tan pop and my inner design goddess happy.

Like dropping yet another load of things that could be better used by others at the Salvation Army.

Like knowing things are going to be amazingly crazy busy and good in a few months and I will look back on this "fallow" time with some wistfulness.

Like that.

Jul 27, 2010 6:59:24 PM | emotional scale, gratitude, Thought Chaperone

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I know who to be about it That's me, alright. A little blurry, cuz things are moving so fast. But in a good way. Looking straight ahead. Observing, scanning, inhaling, devouring, absorbing, savoring, reveling in. Appreciating the contrast, that produces a desire, that launches preferences to my cosmic casting director, who stands with his clipboard of people, circumstances and events in the wings, choreographing them all on the stage of my life according to how I choose to feel in any moment. He's a busy guy these days. When I remember to work my joy pullers and my resistance toys, I get to new places of "getting it". When I don't, I feel like crap. Until I remember again. So what If things suck for a minute, or a hundred? I know what to do about it. Who to be about it. And that has tons more legs than staying stuck in resentment. I've noticed.
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burrs and slime on the horizon http://www.geograph.org.uk/ So I’ve been thinking. Which can be dangerous, for a few reasons. But ’ve been thinking. This contrast that I’m aware of, this bog of burrs and slime, it might just be a very good thing, an indicator of how things have shifted energetically and that instead of having a set point of overwhelm, doubt or worry on certain things, I’m merely irritated, frustrated and impatient now. And this irritation is a big change from the worry/doubt/overwhelm vibe. It’s different, and it’s in my awareness so I notice it more, for the moment. So that’s my new story and I’m sticking to it. I’ve done the work and I’ve moved. I’ve chosen a better feeling thought often enough over the last good long while that the law of attraction is bringing me different thoughts now that match the new vibe instead. It feels different, and pretty soon it will feel normal, and then I’ll move on again. As for all the blissmongering I’ve done over the past few years, that conscious work has contributed mightily to this shift. And just because I can’t maintain it every single minute doesn’t detract from who I’ve been able to be before, or who I’ll be able to be in the future. The only way there’s a downside is if I allow myself to get discouraged about being human, and give up. If I choose to cut off the supply of good feeling stuff out of despair, then I lose. And that ain’t happenin’. For one thing, it’s not true, this assumption that things won’t get better. My resistance-ridden ego would like for me to think that way, but I’ve proven to myself that it’s not true. Falling back on my conditioned, learned, even socially encouraged way of thinking is certainly an option....

Deb Schanilec

Connected and Committed relationship transformation strategist.

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