Tuesday, February 08, 2011

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JOT Day 50 - In the clenches Every once in awhile on this ride of personal growth, something happens. You wake up and realize that the clenching of whatever it is that's on your mind, keeping you up at night--it's not there anymore. And it stays away for half an hour, the rest of the day, possibly even the rest of the week, before old thinking takes over again and the clench comes back. (Cuz the clench does come back, eventually, but the intensity has changed.) That lack of clench is the stuff of dreams. But it's real. It's like the pull of golf, connecting with the sweet spot on the club during a swing. It's an addiction of the highest order, and eliminates any angst about sticking with the game that might have been there right up until that swing. This lack of clench euphoria is stone. real. relief. And the depth of the relief gets deeper, stronger, more pervasive and lasts longer each time it occurs, to the point of it taking awhile to notice that it's dissipated when it finally has. But even then, you're on a new plateau from which to be/do/have, so the playing field has permantently changed anyway. Once you start thinking and acting from a new place, you have access to thoughts and actions that are even more along the lines of what you were looking for, that wasn't available to you in the clenches. Today was one of those unclench days for me. And it's interesting that it came on the heels of a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day quite recently. The degree to which the contrast of these two experiences forms their dichotomy is astounding. But because my focus here with the JOT process is doggedly onward with daily small steps toward what I say and...

Deb Schanilec

Connected and Committed relationship transformation strategist.

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